This podcast will focus on the skills and tools parents and teachers can use to engage in positive communication with kids. Many of us have heard of the blockbuster How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish—and now, we have a follow up book by Adele’s daughter, Joanna Faber and her childhood best friend, Julie King. These two authors were the recipients of all the skills they discuss! Using specific skills taught by Joanna Faber and Julie King, we will feel more confident with understanding how to talk so little kids will listen.
Special guests: Joanna Faber & Julie King
What do you do with a little kid who won’t brush his teeth? Screams in his car seat? Pinches the baby? Refuses to eat her vegetables? Throws books at the library and runs rampant in the restaurant? We’ve all been there. How many of us have seen the parent with the child at the supermarket who is throwing one big tantrum in the cereal aisle because s/he won’t buy the super sugar rainbowloops that he had to– HAD TO– have? How many of us have BEEN that parent with that child? No judgment- we are here to discuss it and get some strategies and scripts to all parents who have ever had some trouble with their young kids.
Many of you who are hungry for parenting and teaching knowledge probably know the blockbuster best-selling book, How to Listen So Kids will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. It’s a staple on my shelf. Well, Adele Faber has a daughter, Joanna Faber who not only grew up being the recipient of all the strategies Faber and Mazlish described in their mega-bestseller, but also wrote a follow up book with her childhood best friend, Julie King that takes a similar structure, using common challenges of young children and provides tool after tool to help anyone with children ages 2-7.
Joanna Faber and Julie King are the authors of How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 (Scribner 2017). The book has been ranked #1 as a best-seller on Amazon, and is being translated into 17 languages world-wide. Joanna and Julie created the soon-to-be-released app Pocket Parent, a companion to their book, as well as the app Parenting Hero. Joanna and Julie lead workshops online and in person, consult privately and give lectures in the U.S. and internationally. Visit them at HowToTalkSoLittleKidsWillListen.com or on Facebook.
The podcast provides:
How Adele Faber’s words about how to figure out what to do governed Joanna and Julie’s parenting behavior How NOT to deal with your child’s negative feelings What to do when your child is having difficult feelings (scenarios provided) What to do to help encourage cooperation Tools to teach kids to help them resolve conflict How praise can backfire How to use productive praise How to connect with neurodiverse kids How to turn negative speech into positive speech when giving feedback and directions to kids.
Important Messages:
What would it feel like if YOU were spoke that way? What if you admitted that YOU were feeling sick or sad or angry—and your coworker told you what to do or how to feel? You’d want some understanding- not “pull yourself together, do it anyway, you’ll be fine once you get there…” Once you acknowledge a feeling, it’s often easier for a child to move forward and move through it. Often with adults, it’s easier to respond appropriately to feelings because we don’t need to get them to do anything. But if feelings are really negative, that could be tough with adults too. (i.e. Joanna tells a story about her friend telling her that she’s worried about some tests—and how Joanna responds) Many video games for kids designed to make them “keep going” and so it’s hard to get them off. Loss points, in the middle, have to complete level… Cliffhangers- chapters. How cope? Make predictions! Sometimes kids have the best ideas! What to say/do when one sibling gets to do something that the other sibling doesn’t get to do. Don’t forget to acknowledge feelings! (Hear Julie’s story about the woman who spoke to her daughter about the pink balloon—and the affect it had on her daughter) You can use art to accept feelings. “Oh no! You are so disappointed!” The mom went to the chalk board and drew a stick figure with a tear coming out of his eye. The boy grabbed a piece of chalk and he started drawing tears too. “Make more!” Then put the stick figure inside a tear. He wrote “sad” and “boo hoo.” And then sighed with contentment and said; “oh well, what should we do now?” We might want to say; “OMG how many more times do I have to tell you to put your shoes away??” But if we try the trick of “what if this was said to you?” then you realize that you would not like it. Imagine if your spouse/partner said to you that you needed to put yo
